New Jersey Family Law Blog

Divorce: Strategies for De-Escalating Financial Conflicts

July 3, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

Some of the biggest hurdles facing a divorcing couple, other than child custody issues, involve money matters. These fights can prove costly, both financially and emotionally. Long, drawn-out arguments over the distribution of assets or the terms of support obligations can extend proceedings and increase the overall cost of your divorce. Therefore, it can be in the best interests of both parties to resolve these issues as expeditiously as possible.

One way to de-escalate financial conflicts is to maintain open communications with your soon-to-be ex, if possible – be honest about your financial situation and expectations. If circumstances surrounding your divorce don’t allow for this open communication, there are other strategies you can explore to help keep your financial conflicts to a minimum. To learn more, read “7 Ways to Reduce Money Conflicts in Divorce.”

Are Your Social Media Habits Jeopardizing Your Marriage?

June 5, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

For many people, social media is simply a way to keep in touch with extended family, reconnect with long-lost friends, share light-hearted memes, or otherwise expand their social and/or professional networks. But what may start out as innocent fun can have troubling consequences for couples who are not open about their social media activities and expectations.

Certain social media interactions, even when engaged in innocently, can be misconstrued as cheating when couples lack this open communication. And since infidelity ranks high on the list of grounds for divorce, this doesn’t bode well for the marriage. To understand what social media activities could jeopardize your marriage, read “10 Social Media Habits That Are Technically Cheating.”

How Divorce Can Be A Catalyst for, Rather Than Protection from, Domestic Abuse

May 1, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

For victims of domestic abuse, freeing themselves from the relationship is paramount to their safety. While divorce is one solution, it may not be as easy as it sounds, and the courts are not always prepared to help.

Abuse can take on many forms—emotional, psychological, and physical. Unfortunately, emotional and psychological abuse can be difficult to prove, often resulting in a he said/she said conflict. Lacking any evidence of physical abuse, the courts hearing divorce motions will often view these cases as “high conflict” divorces and, in doing so, essentially lay blame on both parties. The result is a situation that gets worse before it gets better. To learn more about what a victim of domestic abuse may face when going for a divorce, read “If It’s ‘High-Conflict,’ It’s Likely Post-separation Abuse.”

Not Sure Whether to Stay or Go? A Trial Separation May Help

April 1, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

When a marriage has been in trouble for an extended period, couples may believe their only options are to stay in an unhappy situation or file for divorce. For those not ready to commit either way, there is a third option.

A trial separation can give a couple some breathing room to figure out if their marriage is salvageable or if divorce is imminent. To help decide whether a trial separation could work for you read “7 Signs It’s Time for a Trial Separation, Therapists Say.”

Social Media & Divorce – Why the Two Don’t Mix

March 1, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

Some people find social media a great way to keep up to date with friends and family; others use it to vent their anger and frustrations. The immediacy of social media can be cathartic to some extent, but it can have its consequences especially when you are going through a divorce.

Whether you are sharing photos of your latest impulse purchase or complaining about your soon-to-be ex, what you – and your friends – post on social media can work against you in your divorce. How? Read “Divorce and the Power of Social Media” for more information.

Helping Kids Cope When Co-Parents Don’t Agree on the Rules

February 1, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

While co-parenting after divorce has its benefits, it also presents obstacles – not only for the parents but for the children, too. Let’s face it, if you and your ex agreed on everything, chances are you wouldn’t be divorced. So, it wouldn’t be unusual for divorced parents to have different rules when it comes to raising their children.

When parenting styles differ, it can create confusion and frustration for children who split their time 50/50 between their divorced parents’ homes. In some cases, it may even cause the children to act out and lead to behavioral problems. How can you ease this confusion and make it easier for your child when you and your ex can’t get on the same page? Read “Two Homes, Two Sets of Rules” for some suggestions.

It’s the Conflict, Not the Divorce, That Can Do the Most Harm

January 1, 2024 | Kearns Rotolo Law

Parents have an instinct to protect their children, especially when it comes to matters within their control. That’s why many couples who stay in marriages that are no longer working say they are doing so for the sake of the children. They fear divorce would cause them irreparable harm, but that isn’t necessarily the case. In fact, research shows that often it is the conflict between parents, not the divorce, that does the most harm.

When it comes to divorce, how parents handle themselves and the process can determine what effect the event will have on everyone. A recent Huffington Post survey of children of divorce asked what those children wished their parents had done differently. Their responses may offer some guidance. To learn more, read “17 Things Children of Divorce Wish Their Parents Had Done Differently.”

Rushing Into Divorce Can Lead to Costly Mistakes

December 1, 2023 | Kearns Rotolo Law

Divorce is not a decision to be taken lightly. Although there may come a point where some couples just want to wash their hands of their failing marriage and move forward, rushing into the process can add more problems than it resolves.

Entering into the divorce process without making the necessary preparations can lead to mistakes which can prove costly, both financially and emotionally. For a look at some of the common mistakes a lack of preparation can lead to – and their ramifications – read “4 Early Divorce Mistakes and Why You Should Avoid Them.”

Preparing for Your Divorce

November 1, 2023 | Kearns Rotolo Law

Divorce can be overwhelming whether the decision is a mutual one or not. There are so many details to address and life-changing decisions to be made when you are least emotionally able to do so; being prepared and organized can help relieve some of the stress.

Gathering the necessary documents, financial statements, and other paperwork pertinent to your divorce is your first step in helping to prepare your case. Your divorce attorney can then help you navigate the process and arrive at decisions that are in the best interests of your future. For a list of the type of documents you may need, read “Divorce Checklist: Financial Paperwork You Need for Divorce.”

Looking at the Positives May Ease the Stress of Divorce

October 1, 2023 | Kearns Rotolo Law

No couple starts their married life with the goal of getting divorced, but sometimes that is the only solution. For most people going through it, divorce is stressful, and it conjures up a lot of negative emotions – fear, failure, anxiety. Dwelling on these negatives can make the entire process more difficult.

Although divorce presents a number of obstacles to overcome, it can also present some positives – relief, independence and, in some situations, even safety. Focusing on the positives can make the process easier to endure not only for the couple but for their children as well. For a closer look at both the positive and negative effects of divorce read, “An Honest Look at the Pros and Cons of Divorce.”